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I've had my ups and downs but the last week was the worst. I don't eat, I don't sleep, I cry, I don't feel like seeing anybody. I just want to be left alone in my world online. I feel he is alive and 5 minutes later I am sure he is dead. It really hurts...What hurts the most is the not knowing. At this point I would rather see a picture with him in the coffin, or one from the autopsy.... just to get it over with, to mourn and make peace with it. The fact that I don't know is killing me AND i'M LOOSING HOPE FASTI have to go away from all this, to clear my mind and hopefully to make peace with myself. I cannot take this anymore!!!! I have to put myself togetherStay safe guysLOVE
I usually cheer people up around here when I see they are upset... But this time it has got to me. I cannot bear the pain anymore. I want to believe e is ok. At this point I think I never want him to come back because at one point he would die and then i would go through all these again. I wish I had a tiny tiny sign that he is alive and ok and nothing more. I could take it from there.There's no one I can talk to, cause everybody around me would think I've lost it. So I only talk to God and pray for his well being and for my sanity. Thank you O-drey-O for your nice words...Hopefully I will feel better in a few days and come back with stronger believe. But at this point all I want to do is crawl in a corner and cry.
Neverlandprincess I could watch your sig pic over and over and never get bored. Is there a sweeter man on earth than Michael? How could anyone ever say he'd hurt a child.. :cry:
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