This has an Aussie bent to it...including the humour, language & some characters......
London Olympics recapped in a 414 word sentence
http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/london-olympics-recapped-in-a-414-word-sentence/
Pissing rain in England, Leisel's pudgy, you're a sexist sexist pig if you say Leisel's pudgy, not enough condoms in the Olympic brothel, Harry Potter on par with Industrial revolution as major British cultural event, Queen has a sense of humour, Mr Bean still not funny, petal torch proves not all British youth are rioters, Shut up Eddie...

...Channel Nine loves swimming, Phelps still king, missile misfires, Seebohm not just abbreviation of swear word, D'Arcy lacks punch, Leisel slow and over the hill, Steph slow and over the hill, Ray Warren slow and over the hill, Australia sucks, oops don't say Australia sucks, second in the world is still awesome even though athletes always say "we came here for gold", Shut up Hacky...
...Cocks shuttled off for Badminton racket, Blade Runner not as fast as Harrison Ford, Andy Murray beats Federer in pretend Wimbledon final, New Zealand good at sports where you face backwards, London has a beach, Kazakhstan makes benefit glorious gold medals, Steph loves Kobe, oops, there's Kobe's wife, Bolt loves Swedish handballers, Bolt loves self, Bolt has every right to love self, Bolt a legend, how many times in my life did I feel like throwing vitamins at the telly...
...Horsey royal wins medal, Aussies win triple gold in ocean event no one can follow on TV, Sally rules, Anna Meares rules, whitewater canoeing is apparently a sport, BMX is a apparently a sport, four Aussie blokes who aren't sailors win boaty gold, oh feck, didya see that dive, Shut up Brayshaw...
...Prince Harry wins long jump, hey, apparently soccer is an Olympic sport, Britain loves Muslim Mo Bro, Saudi Arabia has a female athlete, Australia's got Tallent, no, we don't give a flying feck who's going to be in the Big Brother house...
...Bahamas beats America in relay, Jamaica beats America in relay, it is awesome watching small islands beating America in relays, Hooker too busy plotting revolution to remember how to pole vault, Mitcham too busy tweeting to remember how to dive, American runs on broken leg, Steffensen runs as though on broken leg, Shut up Slats...
... USA tops medal tally even though it's officially not a contest, Spice Girls still out of tune, Best games ever but shhh, don't tell Sydney, Sporting legacy of ancient Greece alive and well in Britain, economic legacy of modern day Greece also alive and well in Britain...
... Chickens make people want to click on Olympics stories.