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« on: October 26, 2011, 10:43:39 AM »
I am 38 years old now.
Michael has been the idol of my teenage years.
I have never been a so-called „hardcore“ fan, but even after that I have always loved his music, enjoyed hearing from him, seeing him.
I ovserved the trial in 2005 with great anger and pain. There has never been a doubt in my mind, that all these allegations were false. I just did not understand how anybody could hurt a human being as awesome, talented, hard-working, sincere, caring and noble as him.
So the years went by with me just enjoying his presence on earth.
On June 25 in 2009 I felt sad and shocked hearing that he was gone.
I was caught between „he´s dead, let him rest in peace“ and „no way...this can´t be true“.
After some time of serious thinking and reasoning I thought: well, this is it, ´cause Michael said so!
Meaning: I am perfectly allright with both possibilities: him being alive or him being dead.
All I could think of was: either way he found the peace that he deserves.
Now in 2011 I came „back to topic“ with the Conrad Murray trial coming up.
I did a lot of reading, watched videos and so on.
One day I was just looking at a picture of Michael on my laptop.
My son, who is almost 9 years old now, saw that and asked: „What are you doing?“. I said: „I am looking at a photgraph of someone. Do you know who that is?“.
„No I don´t“ my son replied. So I picked an audio file and played „Beat it“ to him. And I asked: „Do you know who is singing?“. And he gave me a huge smile and said: „Of course I do, that´s Michael Jackson!“. I said:“See that´s the man in the picture you just saw.“. He replied „Oh, I did not know what he looked like. Mum, why does he look so pale and so sad and vulnerable?“.
So I started to show him all kinds of pictures of Michael, explained why his colour of skin changed throughout the years, even explained what made him suffer, what the media and the allegations had done to him, what kind of childhood he has had. I also pointed out that he has not always been so sad in his life and thus I showed him a video of the time at Neverland (the one with the easter eggs and the super soaker and water balloon fights and stuff). And my son´s face lit up with joy and amazement and he showed the happiest smile I have ever seen. He was thoroughly happy.
And at this point I decided for myself: NO! This can NOT be it!
Because the world needs him.......
I am wondering if Michael knows or is aware of the fact that we are not just here because of his music, his looks, the mystery, the thrill, but because of the utter joy he gave us, because of his idealism and his love for mankind....thus: because of the appreciation of his self. We really do need him, the world needs him.
So I came to this page and I have now spent weeks reading.
Finally I decided to just join and say „Hello“ to everybody, because I feel that there is so much love among all of you and so much hope and believe.
All of this I really need these days as things in my life are not going so well and I feel sad and lonely somehow.
I admire your devotion and the strenght that I see and feel everytime I come here. It helps me to sustain my own hope.
I am not a native speaker and so please bear with me if I mess up words or sentences.
I salute you beLIEvers!
Keep up the good work and do not lose hope.
With love for all of you.
bearhug
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