Quote from: curls on December 20, 2012, 02:14:54 AM@Jos, a couple of pages and a restless night later, here's why I'm scared:
Reading between the lines, not taking mere words as fact, both Front and TS give it with the one hand and take it away with the other ..... and then give it back again ..... and take away .... ad infinitum. Front's 'undies' post read to me like he was covering his ass, wriggling out of a bam and blaming it on us, in much the same way as TS said it was our fault MJ hadn't come back at Halloween 2009. Then he pleads with us (well, bec) not to lose faith - 'not now', with the implication of a long road travelled and something imminent. TS increasingly, bless him, doesn't seem to know what the heck is going on, or if he does he always has to throw in the DA card, just in case! Both say we should look at the evidence NOT their 'mere' words - which to give them their due is wise ass covering, especially on a public forum, in case things don't pan out as expected. I would love to have a straightforward no nonsense conversation with these two, face to face, eye to eye!
There's a fine line between being scared and excited, between the head or the heart ruling - I started this whole thing over two and a half years ago (yes, I was late!) with desperate heart, turned into rational, logical head and since the end of November have flitted between the two. Fact is I can't recognise the difference in me any more! Is doubting and questioning just emotional panic or straightforward common sense after all this time? Believing, even 'knowing' (as much as anyone can really know anything), that something too good to be true actually IS true - how much of that was me being 'emotional' and how much was the common sense logic I talked myself into thinking it was? Can I even string a coherant sentence together any more, now we appear to be at the pointy end of proceedings??!!
THEN, I come on this morning to see TIAI redirecting to Front's never lose hope, and other, handwritten messages - and I know what that meant to me at the time, and still does. I know MJ is alive - I haven't doubted that for a long long time - it's all the other stuff that is unsettling me. Do I, can I, should I, put all that to one side and go with the flow, just for a few more days at least?
And @Sim, that 'great adventure' quote you posted for me is all very well, but one man's adventure may well be another's nightmare! Hell, I don't even like rollercoaster rides!