Right. And furthermore, IF it was the real MJ Randy was experiencing ... would a professional like MJ - albeit his long absence from the stage - be sooo 'paralized' and 'riddled with self loathing'? Although stage fright is common and we know Michael took his prep for a stage show extremely serious, we're not talking about an MJ that didn't work while away from the spotlight all those years. So, I would rather say, this describes a first time Michael Fakeson scared to death of the responsibility that weighted on his shoulders. I would be scared to death knowing I'd be a replacement of a living legend and I'd have to make people believe I was MJ ... No way, that was the real Michael.
IF indeed it was MJ, then there were other circumstances that made him 'paralized' ...